While many people struggle with compulsively looking at their cell phone for entertainment and the latest social media posts and communication, I have never thought of myself as addicted to my phone. Rabbi would warn me to be careful not to look at my phone all the time, but I never thought I had any cell phone addiction issues. I would respond to him that I am not addicted to my phone, and that I use my phone in a utilitarian manner to “be there” for family and for ministerial needs. Recently the Holy Spirit proved me wrong.
One of my responsibilities is to prepare the travel arrangements for Rabbi, myself, and our production team. Our recent travel to Israel involved very complicated logistics for ministering, filming, touring, prayer and study in The Land. All of my spiritual notes, directional maps, information and Apps are in my phone. Just prior to departing to Israel, I had a strong, fearful image of my very old cell phone suddenly ceasing to function while in Israel. Of course this served to create anxiety in me, but I pressed onward in prayer, calling on the LORD to cover the function of my phone for all of our upcoming travel needs.
Upon our arrival into Israel, while preparing for bed, sure enough, my cell phone went completely black and dysfunctional. With jet lag weariness and stress related to driving a rental car in a foreign country with my GPS not working now, I reeled in panic! While Rabbi slept, I paced the floor in desperate prayer, crying out for the LORD to touch my phone and make it work again. He did not answer my prayer. I cried out, like David in the Psalms, “LORD, where are you??! I am here in Your Land, yet feel as though You are far from me.” I felt myself sink deeper into fear, anxiety and desperation apart from God and fell to my knees.
Suddenly, the LORD shined His light upon my heart: I am addicted to my phone. Indeed, my phone had become my ultimate resource for maneuvering through our complicated society and daily life. The Holy Spirit spoke to me, “Do you want to lean into the unreliable worldly means, or do you want to lean into Me as your source for all that you need? Do you want to walk in the natural or in the supernatural?” With my heart laid bare before the LORD, I let go. I responded back to Him, “LORD, I want to experience Your supernatural life. I release all of my plans and fallible resources to You. I let go to blindly trust and depend upon YOU.” Immediately the peace of God, that passes all understanding, overtook my mind, body and soul. I looked down, and suddenly, my phone lit up. With my heart peacefully resting in Father’s control and supernatural means for accomplishing His will, my phone functioned perfectly throughout our remaining time in Israel. Beloved, let the Holy Spirit shine in to reveal what it is that your heart is trusting in for security and “safe” navigating through this rugged world. Trusting in the LORD and leaning not on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5) will release you into a new peace and freedom!